Caregiver Resources
Lightways Hospice and Serious Illness Care resources for Caregivers including grief support and end of life care.
Resources for Hospice/End of Life Care
General hospice and end of life care information:
Caregiving for someone with Dementia:
Caring for someone with Cancer:
Caring for a Child with Serious Illness:
Resources & Tool-kits for Children Experiencing Grief
General grief resources for children
https://www.dougy.org/grief-support-resources/duelo-apoyo-recursos-y-grupos#googtrans(en|es)
https://judishouse.org/find-support/resources/
https://judishouse.org/wp-content/uploads/2023/02/Judis-House-Grief-Books-List_2023_FINAL.pdf
Lightways Supporting Kids in Grief Toolkit
Telling a Child Someone Has Died
https://indd.adobe.com/view/1006d8fd-c2ac-4894-84ea-8d2f392d47eb
https://indd.adobe.com/view/fd969b8a-bba9-4c97-963b-c277aad26d5b (spanish)
Children and End of Life Rituals and Rituals
https://indd.adobe.com/view/e66b0d18-90f8-4edc-a046-e1cd1b3bd859
Supporting Child of All Abilities Who Are Grieving Toolkit
https://indd.adobe.com/view/9cf351d4-9fc3-4414-bc2a-cc633ad1e53f
Advice on How to Support Someone Who is Grieving
https://refugeingrief.com/resources-for-supporters
https://www.dougy.org/grief-support-resources/supporters-of-grievers
https://www.dougy.org/assets/uploads/What_to_say_instead.pdf
The Compassionate Friends
Bereaved Parents of USA
Alliance of Hope – Support for Suicide Loss Survivors
Resources for Mental Health Support
TAPS is the national nonprofit organization providing compassionate care and comprehensive resources for all those grieving the death of a military or veteran loved one.
Movie Recommendations about Grief
Speaking Grief – Documentary
Kaila (on Amazon Prime)
Movie about how one mom responded to the loss of her daughter by running a 100 mile run.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=SsB9zXIS6q4
From Scratch (Netflix)
Based on Tembi Locke’s best-selling memoir, From Scratch: A Memoir of Love, Sicily, and Finding Home, about the loss of her beloved husband, Sicilian chef Saro Gullo, who died of cancer in 2012.
https://youtu.be/pXm0SSnQW98?si=VXUFaUh89za9ljAN
P.S. I Love You (2007)
A husband dies, leaving behind letters for his wife starting on her 30th birthday. Each letter helps to ease her mourning and encourages her to move on with life.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=CZzW6_hR068
We Bought a Zoo (2011)
After his wife’s sudden death, a man moves his family to a wildlife park. He and the caretaker form a bond as they rebuild the zoo.
https://youtu.be/Fopeq7wx4sw?si=KBYoKIMiOjKrXhnm
The Way
The Story of a father who after his son died while walking the Camino de Santiago, a traditional pilgrimage route in France and Spain, decides to finish the same pilgrimage.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=o5VZKWcgw6c
Starling
After Lilly suffers a loss, a combative Starling takes nest beside her quiet home. The feisty bird taunts and attacks the grief-stricken Lilly. On her journey to expel the Starling, she rediscovers her will to live and capacity for love. – https://www.imdb.com/video/vi2655240217/?ref_=tt_vi_i_1
After Life – (TV Series by Ricky Gervais on Netflix)
Struggling to come to terms with his wife’s death, a writer for a newspaper adopts a gruff new persona in an effort to push away those trying to help.
https://youtu.be/eIGGKSHMQOM?si=-bgDwpWMx2EBNW7I
We, The Bereaved — Ryan Bouman
Book Recommendations about Grief
Crying at H Mart – Michelle Zauner honors the life and memory of her late cancer stricken mother and their mercurial relationship, in her memoir, CRYING IN H MART (Knopf). She works through grief by learning how to cook Korean food, which helps her cope and connect with her Korean heritage.
A Grief Observed – C S Lewis – A Grief Observed is a collection of C. S. Lewis’s reflections on his experience of bereavement following the death of his wife, Joy Davidman, in 1960.
The Year of Magical Thinking (2005), by Joan Didion (1934–2021), is an account of the year following the death of the author’s husband John Gregory Dunne (1932–2003).
Poor Your Soul – Mira Ptacin –
A memoir that tackles the grief of losing a child from two angles: that of memoirist Mira Ptacin and that of her mother, Poor Your Soul explores the strength and heartbreak of motherhood, and the grief experienced by anyone who has lost someone they loved more than themselves. It tells the story of Ptacin, who became pregnant at 28 years old with a child who would not be able to survive outside the womb, and was faced with three impossible choices about how she could lose the baby. Running parallel to this loss is that of Ptacin’s mother, whose son — Ptacin’s brother — was killed by a drunk driver.
H is for Hawk – Helen Macdonald – Overcome with grief over the loss of her father, writer Helen Macdonald decided to train one of the most difficult and rebellious hawks alive: the goshawk, which boasts a wingspan of nearly two feet. Already an experienced falconer, Macdonald adopted a goshawk named Mabel — a beautiful, ornery, wild creature who helped Macdonald cope with her grief and changed her life.
Men We Reaped – Jesmyn Ward writes about the early and unnecessary deaths of five young men — the kind of deaths being highlighted with increasing frequency on the national news. In the wake of these losses, Ward began to explore what each of their deaths had in common, and what it means to live in a community that is plagued by regular, systemic, and devastating loss and grief. Men We Reaped is an account of these short lives, woven into Ward’s thoughts on racism, poverty, and systemic violence.
The Rules of Inheritance – Claire Bidwell-Smith was just 14-years-old when both of her parents were diagnosed with cancer — and just 11 years later, they had both passed away. The Rules of Inheritance tells the story of the grief that followed: the wanderlust and the partying, the strength and the endurance, and ultimately the great love left behind, even after someone — or everyone — is gone.
The Guardians : An Elegy of a Friend – Sarah Manguso Navigating the death of Manguso’s longtime friend Harris, The Guardians begins with the newspaper coverage of her friend’s death and takes readers through Manguso’s friendship, the ways their relationship evolved through Harris’s time in and out of a psychiatric hospital, and what Harris’s presence and absence in Manguso’s life meant to the writer.
Wild – Cheryl Strayed – After losing her mother to cancer, Strayed was overcome by grief, turning to drug use, casual sex, infidelity, and divorce. Then — as fans of Strayed know — she turned to the trail instead. Wild is the account of Strayed’s solo walk across the Pacific Crest Trail, which tested her strength and helped her manage her grief; and it will definitely inspire you to find productive ways to manage yours. (Also a movie)
Geography of the Heart – Fenton Johnson = Another title that explores the grief that follows the loss of a life partner, a testament to a life-defining love. When Johnson’s partner and lover, Larry Rose, died of AIDS, Johnson went through the many stages of grief: especially denial, anger, sadness. But finally he began to recognize how lucky he was to have had his partner in his life for the amount of time that he did, allowing his grief to give way to the transformative, healing power of love, and recognizing the love that remains after loss.
This is Permission: In This Moment, with All Its Challenges, and All Its Complexity…This Is Permission. Permission to Feel Everything. To Not Know…Anger and Hope – Everything That’s Real. – M H Clark
Healing After Loss: Daily Meditations For Working Through Grief
The Cure for Sorrow: A Book of Blessings for Times of Grief – Jan Richardson
Your Grief, your way: A year of Practical Guidance and Comfort after Loss – Shelby Forsythia
Podcast Resources for Grief
All There Is with Anderson Cooper – Anderson Cooper takes us on a deeply personal exploration of loss and grief. He starts recording while packing up the apartment of his late mother Gloria Vanderbilt. Going through her journals and keepsakes, as well as things left behind by his father and brother, Cooper begins a series of emotional and moving conversations about the people we lose, the things they leave behind, and how to live on – with loss, with laughter, and with love.
“How are you?” is often the last question those grieving want to be asked when they’re feeling, well, pretty terrible. “Terrible, Thanks For Asking” asks real people to share their feelings about how they’re truly doing. Host Nora Mclnerny uses this platform to touch upon themes from loss and illness to grief.
Host Cariad Lloyd uses Griefcast as a platform to invite funny people on to talk about their experiences with death and grief.
Where’s the Grief is hosted by comedian Jordon Ferber, who lost his 21-year-old brother. This podcast helps shine some light into the darkest parts of our own existence and encourages a more open discussion about the effects of grief. In each episode, Ferber has open and honest conversations with other comedians and performers who have unique perspectives on grief.
Grief Dreams – Dr. Black’s wide range of guests join the discussion to reveal their dreams they’ve had of passed loved ones.
Websites & APP Resources for Grief
TEDTALK
When Someone You Love Dies, There’s No Such Thing as Moving On
The Heart and The Bottle App
(also children’s book)
Letsreimagine.org
Online events
Poems & Quotes About Grief
“There are three needs of the griever: To find the words for the loss, to say the words aloud and to know that the words have been heard.”
“What we once enjoyed and deeply loved we can never lose, for all that we love deeply becomes a part of us.”
“So it’s true, when all is said and done, grief is the price we pay for love.”
“There is a sacredness in tears. They are not the mark of weakness, but of power. They speak more eloquently than ten thousand tongues. They are the messengers of overwhelming grief, of deep contrition, and of unspeakable love.”
“Tears shed for another person are not a sign of weakness. They are a sign of a pure heart.”
“Given a choice between grief and nothing, I’d choose grief.”
“They say time heals all wounds, but that presumes the source of the grief is finite.”
“You will lose someone you can’t live without, and your heart will be badly broken, and the bad news is that you never completely get over the loss of your beloved. But this is also the good news. They live forever in your broken heart that doesn’t seal back up. And you come through. It’s like having a broken leg that never heals perfectly—that still hurts when the weather gets cold, but you learn to dance with the limp.”
“Grief changes shape, but it never ends.”
“Grief is not a disorder, a disease or a sign of weakness. It is an emotional, physical and spiritual necessity, the price you pay for love. The only cure for grief is to grieve.”
“Perhaps they are not stars, but rather openings in heaven where the love of our lost ones pours through and shines down upon us to let us know they are happy.”
“Deep grief sometimes is almost like a specific location, a coordinate on a map of time. When you are standing in that forest of sorrow, you cannot imagine that you could ever find your way to a better place. But if someone can assure you that they themselves have stood in that same place, and now have moved on, sometimes this will bring hope.”
“My sister will die over and over again for the rest of my life. Grief is forever. It doesn’t go away; it becomes a part of you, step for step, breath for breath. I will never stop grieving Bailey because I will never stop loving her. That’s just how it is. Grief and love are conjoined, you don’t get one without the other. All I can do is love her, and love the world, emulate her by living with daring and spirit and joy.”
“Give sorrow words; the grief that does not speak knits up the o-er wrought heart and bids it break.”
“Grief can be a burden, but also an anchor. You get used to the weight, how it holds you in place.”
“How lucky I am to have something that makes saying goodbye so hard.”
“Don’t cry because it’s over. Smile because it happened.”
“The reality is that you will grieve forever. You will not ‘get over’ the loss of a loved one; you’ll learn to live with it. You will heal and you will rebuild yourself around the loss you have suffered. You will be whole again but you will never be the same. Nor should you be the same nor would you want to.”
“You don’t move on after loss, but you must move with. You must shake hands with grief, welcome her in, for she lives with you now. Pull her a chair at the table and offer her comfort. She is not the monster you first thought her to be. She is love. And she will walk with you now, stay with you now, peacefully. If you let her. And on the days when your anger is high, remember why she came, remember who she represents. Remember. Grief came to you my friend because love came first. Love came first.“